Getty Images, Joe Scarnici

How exactly The Situation plans to maintain his new found sobriety on a show fueled by alcohol is unclear but the ‘Jersey Shore‘ star is bound and determined to return for the show’s sixth season, drunk or not. “Bound” is the key word here, as The Situation will be forced to miss a court date in his ongoing legal battle with Abercrombie & Fitch due to his contractual obligations to appear on the MTV hit this June.

“The Situation,” government name Mike Sorrentino, is suing the clothing company for ten-million dollars for selling “Situation” and “G.T.L.” themed apparel. Abercombie & Fitch claims their designs are pure parody and therefore non-infringing on any trademarks Sorrentino or MTV might hold. Interestingly enough, A&F once offered to pay Sorrentino not to wear their clothes.

TMZ reports The Situation, who was recently in rehab for a substance abuse problem, is scheduled to appear in court for the case on June 14th but is asking to postpone the date, as he’s to appear on “Jersey Shore” from May 22nd to July 7th.

Though both the show’s marquee stars, The Situation and Snooki will be back, with one sober and the other pregnant, we’re left wondering what’s the point.

Source: ScreenCrush.com

Justin Sullivan, Getty Images

If you’re a Verizon Wireless customer who was grandfathered in with an unlimited data plan after the company eliminated the option for new customers, enjoy it while it lasts — the company will be moving you to a tiered plan soon.

Speaking at the JP Morgan Technology, Media and Telecom conference on Wednesday, Verizon CFO Fran Shammo said customers with unlimited 3G data access will be required to switch to a data-share plan after transitioning to the company’s 4G LTE service.

“LTE is our anchor point for data share. So, as you come through an upgrade cycle and you upgrade in the future, you will have to go on to the data share plan,” Shammo said. “Everyone will be on [it]. A lot of our 3G base is on unlimited… [and] when they migrate off 3G they will have to go to data share.”

So when will that happen and how much will it cost? The data share plan is scheduled to launch in mid-summer, but pricing details have yet to be announced.

[Fierce Wireless]

Getty Images

A music legend has died and the Biebs is stupid rich (shocker) – in today’s Darcy Report!

Disco legend Donna Summer has passed away at the age of 63. She had been battling cancer for quite some time, thoughs he tried to keep it out of the public eye. RIP Donna, you will be missed!

The Bieber is on the cover of the Forbes magazine issue naming their Celebrity 100 list. While Jennifer Lopez comes in the top spot – Bieber ain’t doing to bad for himself, either.

New on TV Tonight:
8pm – Missing (ABC), The Big Bang Theory (CBS), Community (NBC), American Idol (FOX)
8:30pm – 30 Rock (NBC), Rules of Engagement, (CBS)
9pm – Touch (Fox), Grey’s Anatomy (ABC), The Office (NBC), Person of Interest (CBS)
9:30pm – Parks and Recreation (NBC)
10pm – Scandal (ABC), The Mentalist (CBS), Awake (NBC), Punk’d (MTV)
10:30pm – The Pauly D Project (MTV)

Today’s Friends With Benefits code is FORBES. Enter it here to get 2500 points!

Check out The Darcy Report weekdays at 4:30pm on 105.7 Crush-FM!

New York State Missing Persons

UPDATE: Jesse Cale, who went missing last Friday in Greenwich, has been found dead near the campsite where he was last seen.

More from News 10

Jesse Cale was camping with family and friends along the Hudson River in the Washington County town of Greenwich this weekend when he disappeared Friday night.

Around midnight Friday, Cale walked from the campground to look for firewood and did not return. Family and friends searched, then called 911. Rescue crews have been searching throughout the weekend.

Cale is 6′, 170 lbs, with red hair. He was last seen wearing a red shirt, white hooded sweatshirt, and jeans. He is said to suffer from a seizure disorder. Anyone with any information is asked to contact state police immediately.

[Glens Falls Post Star]

OMG this is ridiculous. You know the grammy award winning Adele, right? Well apparently she has invaded Jenna’s life, for real.  Jenna goes to the bathroom, poof, there’s Adele with these creepy eyes asking  “Want me to wipe you bum for you”? Of course, Jenna is dressed as Adele, wig and all. This has to be one of Jenna’s best video’s.

ROTFL, yep, you’ll be doing that. Gather your co-workers and enjoy this masterpiece.

Police say a woman was in the parking space and accidentally hit the gas instead of the brake. She suffered only minor injuries and was taken to the hospital. Nobody else was reported injured.

The store shut down briefly, but re-opened shortly after. The hole has been boarded up.

youtube

Beastie Boys “Sabotage” was most voted yesterday thanks to your clicking and selecting of your 4 favorites. Ready to do it again? Why not, right- It’s a beautiful Thursday which of course, is the day before the weekend! High Five to that, no? Alright, enough of my 2 cents. Instructions on voting are below. Enjoy!

Pick your fav 4 below and click vote. That will solidify your four favorite selections in the poll we call, say it with me- The Facebook Four”. Happy Voting! Ps- We play emm back at 3:56p.

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‘The Queen Of Disco’ and singer of ‘Last Dance’, ‘Bad Girls’, ‘Hot Stuff’, and ‘She Works Hard For The Money’ has died at the age of 63. 

Summer had been battling cancer and died Thursday morning in Florida. TMZ learned from people close to her, that she was trying to keep her illness out of the public limelight. In fact, she had been working on a new album.

During her music career, she picked up 5 Grammy Awards.

Giri then continued down Lark and turned onto Hamilton Street and then Dove Street. After making a right on a Dove Street Giri hit 3 more cars. One of the cars, a Camaro, was hit so hard that it spun into the middle of the street and hit 2 parked cars.  According to Officer Steve Smith, the Camaro was hit so hard that the bumper landed on Giri’s windshield. Of course Giri had to get rid of the bumper so he backed his car up as to remove the bumper. I’m assuming he acted like he was stuck in the snow and just reversed and stepped on it.

Fortunately, Giri finally stopped at Dove Street  and Madison Avenue. I’m happy to say that Giri Gautam, of 17 Morris Street, was charged with aggravated driving while intoxicated and given many traffic tickets.  Thankfully, no one was injured  by this guy’s lack of common sense.

Frankly, I’m hoping the judge takes this guy’s license and gives him a few months to think about what could have happened if someone would have been crossing the street when Giri was clipping cars like bowling pins.

Giri Gautam (Albany police photo)

Chris Hondros, Getty Images

Here’s a look at some interesting events that took place on this day in history:

1792 – The New York Stock Exchange is formed (More info)

1875 – The first Kentucky Derby is held at Churchill Downs in Louisville, Ky. (More info)

1954 – The Supreme Court rules against school segregation in Brown v. Board of Education (More info)

1973 – Televised hearings about the Watergate affair begin in the US Senate (More info)

2004 – Massachusetts becomes the first US state to legalize same-sex marriage (More info)

Frazer Harrison / Kevin Winter, Getty Images

Here’s a look at some notable birthdays being celebrated today:

Bill Paxton
Age: 57
Occupation: Actor
Known For: Starring roles in movies like ‘Apollo 13,’ ‘Twister,’ ‘Aliens,’ ‘True Lies,’ and ‘Titanic,’ and his role as patriarch Bill Henrickson on the HBO series ‘Big Love’

Craig Ferguson
Age: 50
Occupation: Television Host, Writer and Comedian
Known For: Starring as the title character’s boss on ‘The Drew Carey Show’ before going on to host the very funny and Peabody Award-winning late-night talk show, ‘The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson’

Bob Saget
Age: 56
Occupation: Actor and Comedian
Known For: Starring in the family-friendly ‘Full House,’ hosting ‘America’s Funniest Home Videos,’ narrating ‘How I Met Your Mother,’ and shocking people with his remarkable potty-mouth during live stand-up shows

Sugar Ray Leonard
Age: 56
Occupation: Retired Boxer
Known For: Being the first boxer to earn more than $100 million in prize money, winning world titles in five weight divisions and defeating name-brand opponents like Wilfred Benítez, Thomas Hearns, Roberto Durán and Marvin Hagler

Trent Reznor
Age: 47
Occupation: Singer, Songwriter and Composer
Known For: Being the frontman for industrial rock band Nine Inch Nails, known for songs like ‘Closer,’ ‘The Hand That Feeds’ and ‘Only,’ and his Oscar-winning score for the movie ‘The Social Network’

Quinn Rooney, Getty Images

Us girls are always getting gawked at when we’re trying to get our tan on at the beach, so when the rugby team from St Kilda, Australia needed to take an icy swim the other day, we got to return the favor.

Apparently the cold works wonders on helping repair an athlete’s muscles, which is why hotties Lenny Hayes, Rhys Stanley and the rest of the boys were freezing their nips off. Who knew, right? As tough as these guys are, you’ll get a kick out of them giggling and bouncing around in the waves.

Quinn Rooney, Getty Images

Quinn Rooney, Getty Images

Quinn Rooney, Getty Images

Quinn Rooney, Getty Images

Quinn Rooney, Getty Images

Quinn Rooney, Getty Images

Quinn Rooney, Getty Images

Paramount Pictures / Universal Pictures / Lionsgate

This weekend, you’ll have your choice between a goofy comedy, watching things blow up, and a tale about the joys and perils of new parenthood.

In ‘The Dictator,’ Sacha Baron Cohen stars as the title character who risked his life to ensure that democracy would never come to the country he so lovingly oppressed.

Based on the classic board game, ‘Battleship’ is an epic action-adventure that unfolds across the seas, in the skies and over land as our planet fights for survival against a superior force.

And ‘What to Expect When You’re Expecting,’ inspired by the self-help book of the same name, tells the story of a group of expectant parents dealing with the surprise demands of pregnancy.

Here’s a sneak peek.

‘The Dictator’

Directed by: Larry Charles
Starring: Sacha Baron Cohen, Anna Faris, Ben Kingsley, Jason Mantzoukas
Get Tickets & Showtimes

‘Battleship’

Directed by: Peter Berg
Starring: Taylor Kitsch, Alexander Skarsgård, Rihanna, Brooklyn Decker, Tadanobu Asano, Hamish Linklater, Liam Neeson
Get Tickets & Showtimes

‘What to Expect When You’re Expecting’

Directed by: Kirk Jones
Starring: Cameron Diaz, Jennifer Lopez, Elizabeth Banks, Chace Crawford, Brooklyn Decker, Ben Falcone, Anna Kendrick, Matthew J. Morrison
Get Tickets & Showtimes

YouTube

There are a ton of guys out there who claim to have no shame in their game, but Wisconsin resident Bill Wisth takes the cake… or should we say all-you-can-eat fish fry. The 6’6,” 350 lbs. mountain of a man claims he had 12 pieces of fried fish before a supposedly “all you can eat” seafood restaurant — ‘Chuck’s Place’ — tried to persuade him to leave with an additional eight pieces to go.

Mr. Wisth was so upset by the restaurant’s “false advertising” that he’s dedicated most of his time to picketing outside the eatery, which claims they literally ran out of fish on the busy Friday night he was served.

According to Chuck’s, the now-banned fried fish lover has been a thorn in their side, accumulating a tab he hasn’t paid off yet. A tab? For food? This guy’s like Norm from ‘Cheers.’ This could be the most classic case of biting the hands that feeds you we’ve ever seen.

We have a feeling the folks at Long John Silver’s and Red Lobster are rubbing their flippers and/or claws together at the opportunity to satisfy Mr. Wisth’s voracious appetite.

Of course, Mr. Wisth reminds us of another hungry man who was turned away from an all-you-can-eat seafood buffet.

Fox

Source: TheFW.com

Curtis Lumber

Meet 49 year old Barbara LaFleur of Saratoga Springs. She likes to shop. Naked. Unfortunately the women’s departments at Curtis Lumber and Stewart’s were all out of spring fashions.

LaFleur entered both stores on Tuesday in what District Attorney James Murphy said was a form of ‘free expression’ according to the Saratogian. Before leaving Curtis Lumber, she apparently asked employees what time it was – hmmmm, were they able to tell her without looking down? Pretty much the same thing happened at Stewarts and she was asked to leave.

Police eventually caught up with LaFleur and charged her with public lewdness – which could get her 90 days in jail.

This picture, caught from surveillance video at Curtis Lumber made its way to Facebook (lucky for us).

[Times Union] [WNYT]

booleansplit, Flickr

When you’re buying sunscreen, do you look for words like ‘waterproof,’ ‘sweatproof’ and ‘sunblock?’ If so, don’t bother — they may not be as bulletproof as they seem.

Last year, the FDA mandated that sunscreen manufacturers had to stop using the above descriptions because no product is truly waterproof or sweatproof, and even the best sunscreens don’t completely block harmful rays. And although the ban was supposed to be in place this summer, makers now have until this winter to comply.

Products claiming to be ‘waterproof’ or ‘sweatproof’ will have to prove it with standard testing and state exactly how long a product will stay on the skin after being exposed to water or perspiration.

In addition, terms like ‘sunblock’ will be replaced with ‘broad spectrum’ as long as a product has an SPF rating of at least 15 and protects the user from both UVA rays (associated with skin cancer) and UVB rays (which can cause sunburn).

That said, sunscreens on the shelves are still effective and the FDA encourages their use, saying, “The ingredients in FDA-approved sunscreens marketed today have been used for many years, and FDA has no reason to believe these products are not safe.”

[Time]

Getty Images

Chippendales and reality television – all in today’s Darcy report!

Kim + Kanye really are the perfect pair with their ridiculous need to have all the attention on them. Kim has announced that Kanye will appear on ‘several episodes’ of Keeping Up With The Kardashians this season because the show is about her life – after all. They are a disturbing match made in heaven.

WOAH! Grab those plane tickets to Vegas ladies, and check out the newest Chippendale – none other than Joey Lawrence! He’ll be apart of the show at the Rio from June 7-24 only, go grab those singles and get to sin city!

New on TV Tonight:
8pm – The Middle (ABC), American Idol (FOX), Betty White’s Off Their Rocker (NBC),
8:30pm – Betty White’s Off Their Rocker (NBC), Suburgatory (ABC)
9pm – Modern Family (ABC), Criminal Minds (CBS), America’s Next Top Model: British Invasion (CW), Rock Center with Brian Williams (NBC),
9:30pm – Don’t Trust The B— in Apartment 23 (ABC)
10pm – Revenge (ABC), <The Soup (E!), Law & Order: Special Victims Unit (NBC), Randy Jackson Presents: America’s Best Dance Crew (MTV)

Today’s Friends With Benefits code is WOAH. Enter it here to get 2500 points!

Check out The Darcy Report weekdays at 4:30pm on 105.7 Crush-FM!

South Glens Falls Memorial Day Parade 2012

cwwycoff1, flickr

When: Friday, May 25th at 6:PM

Where: South Glens Falls, NY

The parade starts at the corner of Main and William Street, continues down Main St to the Village Triangle Park. The parade is to honor veterans. If you’re up north, check out a great hometown parade!

Lake George Memorial Day Parade 2012

Dawn Paperin, flickr

When: Saturday, May 26th at 10:30 AM

Where: Lake George, NY

The parade kicks off at 11:30 but get there by 10:30 to get a good spot and to beat the road closures ahead of the parade. The route runs along Beach Road, up Canada St, followed by a ceremony in Shepards Park featuring guest speakers, and others. Also, a tribute to the American Legion. For more information about all of the great events and parades in the Lake George area check out their official site.

Sunday 4 poetry

dwicx, flickr

When: Sunday, May 27th at 3:PM

Where: Old Songs Community Arts Center, Voorheesville NY

Grab the little ones and enjoy Sunday before Memorial Day open mic poetry along with featured poet, Thom Francis.  A donation of $3 would be greatly appreciated. For more info on a nice night of poetry click here.

Albany Memorial Day Parade 2012

sebastien.barre, flickr

When: Monday, May 28th at 9:30PM

Where: Albany, NY

The parade route begins at Patridge St and Central Avenue running east on Central to Washington Avenue to North Hawk Street. The parade will be followed  by a ceremony at the Vietnam Veterans Memorial in Lafayette Park.  For more information on the Albany Memorial Day Parade as well as upcoming events go to this site.

Glens Falls Memorial Day Parade 2012

Matt Champlin, flickr

When: Mon, May 28th at 10:AM

Where: Downtown Glens Falls, NY

Just in case you can make it south to the Albany area here’s head to Glens Falls. The parade starts at Maple Street heading along Glen Street to Crandall Park. After the parade at Crandall Park there will be a remembrance ceremony.

Harry How, Getty Images

Never one to shy away from the media, Kanye West is doing whatever he can to get himself some more face time on reality television a la his girlfriend, Kimmy K.

According to Yahoo!, Kanye will appear on ‘several episodes’ of the upcoming season of Keeping Up With The Kardashians – and Kim is okay with it.

I want to show my life… If we are having dinner and he does show up, I’m sure we’re not going to go, ‘Stop the cameras!’

Two seasons ago was her meeting Kris Humphries and getting engaged, last season was about her wedding and divorce, is this season about her getting re-married?

Guess we’ll have to wait and see!

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The actor’s wife reported him missing earlier in the week. He was last seen on Wednesday, May 9. 

Stahl, who lives in the Los Angeles area, had reportedly been visiting the ‘skid row‘ area of the city – known for abundant drug use and homelessness. In February, his wife filed papers asking the courts to limit his time with their daughter and be drug tested prior to any visits he may have with her. They have been separated since January.

In addition to ‘Terminator 3‘, Stahl has starred in ‘The Thin Red Line‘,  ’ Bully‘, and ‘the HBO series ‘Carnivale‘. He is 32 years old.

[USA Today] [TMZ]